A Wedding in the Mountain
by Curlyhedgehog
Summary: Third instalment after Don't Look Down and Gaining Ground. It's the night before Sigrid and Fili's wedding feast. From a bachelorette party with a tipsy bride, to embarrassing relatives, and speeches the bride and groom wish hadn't happened, a wedding's not a wedding unless your family drives you just a little bit crazy. AU everyone lives. Figrid. Rated for sexual references.
1. Chapter 1

Tauriel showed Sigrid the crate, carefully stowed in the cool stores of the kitchen. "This is my gift to you, mellon, for your gathering."

"Oh, thank you, Tauriel," Sigrid said, peering into the crate. A dozen thick, oddly-shaped bottles stoppered with corks were lined up inside. "What is it?"

"It is a rare elvish wine. My people traditionally drink it during the Feast of Starlight, and on other special occasions." Tauriel smiled at Sigrid. "It seemed appropriate."

Sigrid was touched. "That's very thoughtful, Tauriel, thank you. But, to be honest, I feel a bit silly to be having this gathering at all. Fili and I handfasted months ago."

"Ah, but it's dwarvish custom, mellon. You and I, we've both chosen our path, here in the Mountain. They're our customs too, now." Tauriel tilted her head at Sigrid and grinned. "And you wouldn't want to deny Dis her party, would you?"

Sigrid laughed. "Never."

* * *

Late that afternoon in their chamber, after he'd finished dressing for his night out, Fili took Sigrid in his arms. "Thank you for doing this, love."

She smiled. "Your customs are my customs now. Tauriel said that to me this morning. She was right." She gave him a kiss. "So, what will you be up to tonight?"

Fili shrugged. "I don't know. Kili's organised it, and he's not let on anything to me. All I know is that the whole company is coming, as well as your Da and Bain. We'll probably ride out, shoot some game for a camp supper, and wind up at the tavern in Dale and get roaring drunk."

"The night before our wedding feast?" Sigrid laughed. "That's not a lot of time to nurse a sore head."

"Believe me, if I could get out of it, I would. What does Mother have in store for you?"

"Don't know. Tauriel's brought elvish wine for us, that's all I know. What usually goes on at these things?"

"I have no idea. Sharing braiding tips? Pillow fights?" Sigrid laughed again and swatted his shoulder, and he grinned. "And elvish wine? You might be the one nursing the sore head, love."

"Don't worry about me. You just come back in one piece. Tomorrow's a big day."

"I will." He drew her closer. "Have a good night, and I'll see you at the feast. All those agreements will be signed, and you'll be stuck with me."

"Mmm, lucky me." She pulled him towards her for a last kiss. He released her reluctantly, and made his way to the door, giving her a smile from the doorway, and left to meet up with Kili.

* * *

Sigrid was just wondering if she should go and find out where she ought to be, when there was a knock at the door. She opened it to find Tauriel and Tilda, both wearing silver filigree tiaras on their head.

"Come on, Sigrid," said Tilda brightly. "It's time." She reached up and placed another tiara lopsidedly on Sigrid's head.

"What on earth?" She took the trinket off and looked at it, then placed it back more securely atop her head. "I have to wear this?"

"We all do. Come on, everyone's waiting." They took Sigrid's hands and led her, laughing, through the corridors of the Mountain to Dis's chambers.

* * *

"Ah, here she is!"

Sigrid peered through the door. It seemed crowded. Dis had placed a number of extra chairs around the room, and Sigrid was happy to see that Britte the seamstress, Bain's young sweetheart Marta, and Gloin's wife Gayle had joined them in addition to her family. They all sported the same filigree tiaras as Tauriel and Tilda, with varying degrees of success.

Sigrid lifted the tiara from her own head and held it up to Dis with a raised eyebrow and a smile. "Are you responsible for these, Dis?"

"Apprentices need to practise, Sigrid dear. They might as well practise on something useful," she shrugged, pouring Sigrid a goblet of elvish wine. "They'll be melted down and reused later. Come, put it back on."

Sigrid replaced the tiara, and Dis handed her her drink and motioned her towards an empty seat, before addressing the gathering.

"Welcome everyone, to Sigrid's bride's night. As some of you know, it's traditional for the groom's friends and the bride's friends to gather separately and treat them to a night of fun and entertainment before their wedding. Notwithstanding the fact that Sigrid and Fili are already handfast," she paused, raising her goblet in Sigrid's direction, "we didn't get to do this then, so we're doing it now. Tomorrow is their wedding feast, and tonight we're going to give Sigrid a night to remember." She raised her goblet. "To Sigrid and Fili."

Everyone raised their goblets and chorused, "Sigrid and Fili," and drank. Sigrid smiled her thanks fondly to Dis and took a sip from her goblet.

"Tauriel!" she exclaimed, after tasting the wine. "This wine has bubbles in it!"

"It's very rare. Sometimes bottles will explode from the pressure before they can be drunk," Tauriel smiled. "Legend has it that a wine maker, long ago, accidentally bottled a vintage before it had finished fermenting. Later, when he tasted the wine, it was full of bubbles, and he cried out in delight, 'I am drinking the stars.' It has been a part of the Feast of Starlight ever since."

Sigrid shook her head in amazement. "It's the most delicious thing I've ever tasted. I can't believe you brought us a dozen bottles."

"As I said this morning, it's a special occasion. Enjoy it, mellon."

* * *

Sigrid took another sip of her sparkling wine, and relaxed back into her chair. She wiggled her toes.

"Hold still, please, Lady Sigrid."

Sigrid giggled. "Sorry, Benni." She was dressed in a robe made from towels, her goblet in hand, and on the floor in front of her, a young dwarf named Bennon had washed and massaged her feet, filed her toenails, and was now painting them red with a tiny horsehair brush.

"There you go, Lady Sigrid. Just wait for that lacquer to dry before you go walking about."

"Thanks, Benni. You're amazing." Sigrid looked around the room. Bennon's two apprentices were also hard at work, one giving Tauriel a head massage, her silver tiara in her lap and her long auburn hair flopped over her face, and the other carefully dabbing a creamy, sweet-smelling concoction onto Gayle's face. "I'm finished. Who's next?"

"Ooh, me please," piped up Tilda. "I've had my face done, but not my toes." She yawned.

"All right, Tilda, you go next. Then it's off to bed for you, love. It's getting late."

Dis leaned over from her chair and topped up Sigrid's goblet, before offering her a plate. "Strawberries?"

"Yum, yes please."

"Gorin sent these up for you especially."

"He's sweet. I'm glad he's doing so well. Did you hear Jerrik has taken him on as apprentice?"

Gayle snorted from underneath her face cream. "Maybe he can help keep Jerrik organised."

"You were lucky things turned out as they did, Sigrid," said Britte. Sigrid nodded.

"Born under a lucky star?" said Marta softly.

"Luckiest in the Mountain, for mine," Bennon quipped, giving Sigrid a wink. "I should be so lucky."

They all laughed, except Marta and Tilda.

"Oh, I don't know about that," said Britte with a grin. "I would say the Lady Tauriel's the luckier lass."

"And what about you, Lady Tilda?" Bennon asked, looking up at Tilda from her feet. "Do you favour Prince Fili or Prince Kili?"

"Oh, is that what you're talking about?" Tilda thought for a moment, a crease of concentration on her brow. "Well, Fili's better with a blade, but Kili's better with a bow, so I'd have to say Kili."

There was another burst of laughter, again except from Marta, who looked slightly worried, and Tilda, who looked confused.

"Quite right, Taurauthiel," said Tauriel, with a smile for her young friend.

"I'm finished, and I'm for bed," said Tilda with another yawn. "Thanks Bennon, that was fun. How do I look, Sigrid?" She held up a foot for inspection.

"Very nice, Tilda. Goodnight, love." Sigrid smiled as Tilda waved a general farewell and left. She turned back to the group and saw Marta's face. "Marta, what's wrong?"

Sigrid heard bare snatches of words in Marta's mumbled response, her eyes as round as saucers and darting from herself to Tauriel to Dis. "…to be making so free… you and Lady Tauriel… and the Lady Dis right there…"

"Don't look so shocked, girl," said Gayle, as Bennon's assistant wiped her face clean with a warm cloth. "There's no harm in appreciating a fine display of… sword play."

"I'm quite well aware of how good-looking my sons are, Marta. They take after their father." Dis smiled, and her eyes turned soft. "My Farli. He was the handsomest creature I'd ever seen. Fili has his hair, you know, and Kili has his brown eyes."

"Aye, he was a fine figure of a dwarf," said Gayle. "Oh, the dams that envied you on your wedding day, Dis." She grinned. "And your wedding night, for that matter."

"What happened to him, Dis?" asked Sigrid softly. "Fili told me he died when he was young."

"An orc raid, up in the Iron Hills. Fili was only eight. It was a long time ago now." She looked wistful. "I still miss him sometimes."

Gayle raised her eyebrows with a smirk. "Rumour has it that you've not been inconsolable, though."

Dis tossed her head, but her lips were pursed to keep from smiling. "Maybe. Maybe not. Rumours are rumours. I wouldn't put too much store in them."

"Want to hear a rumour I've heard?" Sigrid raised an eyebrow slyly. "I heard that a certain widowed dairy farmer is not insensible to the charms of a certain town seamstress."

Everyone laughed, including Britte, but her cheeks were glowing where Bennon had started applying her face mask.

Sigrid smiled. "I'm glad for you both. Arrild deserves to be happy again. He has such a warm heart."

"Warm bed, too, I'll wager," said Bennon, with a wink at Britte. She swatted his arm playfully.

Sigrid looked at Marta. Her eyes were still as round as saucers. This type of conversation was clearly a revelation to the young woman, and Sigrid hoped she wasn't too shocked. Maybe she needed another drink. From across the room, Sigrid heard a loud pop as Tauriel opened another bottle of wine, and she held out her own goblet for a top-up.

* * *

The bottle came to rest, its neck pointing toward Dis.

She threw up her hands. "No, no, not me." There was a general cry of "Yes, come on," and she pursed her lips with a smirk. "Oh, all right then. Go on."

"I've got one," said Britte. "Most unusual location."

Dis inhaled, paused for a moment, then let her breath out slowly. "Throne room."

Shrieks of laughter filled the air.

"No!"

"Really!"

"What, here in the Mountain?"

Gayle grinned. "Told you she wasn't inconsolable."

"Come on Dis, spill," said Britte.

"Stayed up drinking after a feast one night, and got a bit carried away. Not telling who."

Dis grabbed the bottle and spun it around. It came to rest pointing at Sigrid, amidst more squeals and laughter.

"Oh, no!" she wailed.

"Same question," said Britte. "Most unusual location."

Sigrid lifted her goblet and pointed a finger in Britte's direction. "You'll pay for this."

"Ooh, I'm shaking," Britte laughed. "Come on."

Sigrid took a sip. "On the grass, at the top of the Long Lake. You know who."

Dis looked up at the corner of the ceiling and put her fingers in her ears. "Not listening."

Sigrid grabbed the bottle and spun it.

"Ha! Britte. Same question."

Britte thought for a minute, biting her lip. "Can't think of anything really noteworthy. Suddenly I feel extremely boring. No, wait, how about the back room of my shop?"

More laughter. Britte shrugged.

"What can I say? Arrild has kids. It's hard to manage."

Britte spun the bottle, and it came to rest pointing at Marta. She blushed bright red and started shaking her head.

"No, no, I've never… I mean, I haven't…"

"It's all right, Marta. Different question for you. You have to confess… your first crush."

Marta looked relieved. "Oh, that's easy. Bain of course."

There was an outcry.

"No, no."

"He doesn't count."

"Are you telling us you never had a crush on anyone before you started seeing Bain?"

Marta's eyes darted evasively around the room. She finally looked down and gave a quiet, impish smile. "I have to say, I always thought Prince Legolas of the Woodland Realm was very fine."

"Don't we all," said Britte, lifting her glass.

"What say you, Tauriel?" said Gayle. "The Prince Legolas?"

Tauriel had been keeping out of the discussions, smiling with amusement at the antics of the others and quietly topping up their goblets. She raised her eyebrows at Gayle's direct question.

"Prince Legolas is, I agree, very fine in appearance."

"And did you two ever…" pressed Gayle.

Tauriel frowned and turned a repressive stare on Gayle. "I was Captain of the Guard, Gayle. It does not do to engage in romantic entanglements in one's place of employment."

Gayle snorted. "Pish tosh. I met Gloin in a forge where we were both working as apprentices. If that bottle had wound up pointing at me, I'd've told you some tales that would make your hair curl."

Squeals of laughter.

"Really? Gloin?"

"Would never have thought it."

"Come on then, Gayle. Give us something good."

She sipped her drink. "Let's see, in the forge, in my parents' bed, in his parents' bed, on a riverbank, in the kitchen store cupboards…"

"All right, all right, we get the idea," said Dis.

"Well, we've been married nearly 90 years now," she shrugged. "Have to keep it interesting."

Everyone laughed, including Marta.

* * *

"Five."

"Three."

"None."

"Eight."

"Ooh, snap. Eight. Tauriel?"

A pause. "Thirty seven."

Shrieks, and bursts of giggling.

"You must remember, though, that's over a span of six hundred years."

* * *

It was time to go.

"I've had the best night, Dis," drawled Sigrid, holding on to Tauriel in order to stay upright. "You're the best mother-in-law. I love you." She held out an arm to her, and Dis leaned in for an embrace. Sigrid's tiara wobbled on her head and she lifted an unsteady hand to catch it. "Can I keep my tiara? I want to keep my tiara. It's the best."

"Of course you can, Sigrid dear. Tauriel, you'll make sure she gets back safely to her chamber?"

"I will, Dis."

As she made her way to the door, Sigrid looked back at the group, cleaning up and setting Dis' room back to rights, and flailed an arm in their direction. "I love you Britte. And you Gayle. And you Marta. You're the best. It was the best night. We should do it again." She peered up at Tauriel. "I love you most of all, Tauriel. You're my best friend."

"You are very dear to me too, mellon. Come on now, it's time to go."

"You know, when I was little I didn't ever think I'd marry a dwarf and have an elf as a best friend. Life's funny, isn't it?"

"Yes, it's very amusing, Sigrid. Keep walking now."


	2. Chapter 2

"Here, brother." Kili slid into the bench next to Fili and handed him a tankard. Fili looked sideways at his brother with a grin, and lifted the tankard towards him.

"Well done, Kili, and thanks. That was fun."

Kili grinned back and clinked his tankard against Fili's. "Knew it."

They drank, and looked around the West Hall. Fili had been expecting his groom's night to follow the predictable, fairly boring pattern of a meal and drinks at the tavern, perhaps with a "kill-it-yourself" twist, but Kili had had other plans. For weeks he had been crafting pint-sized bows, and arrows tipped with wads of padding, soaked in a juice mixture to make a mark when they hit, and he had staged a mock battle for the company amongst the bushes in the paddocks beyond the stables. As the two best archers, Kili and Bard had led the two teams, with Thorin and Fili as their seconds and Balin acting as referee, and despite Kili's having cribbed a raft of elvish archery techniques from Tauriel, it was Bard and Fili's team that had taken the victory. They had come back to the West Hall after the battle, laughing, famished and thirsty, and typically for the company, their meal had degenerated into a food fight, complete with Bofur leading some bawdy songs with his odd dancing. Like much of the room, including the dwarves and men starting to doze off around the tables in front of them, the two brothers were strewn with food, odd bits of cake and pie on their clothes and in their hair, and coupled with an assortment of red juice stains from arrow hits, they looked a proper mess.

Kili sipped his ale. "Still say I would have had you if I hadn't tripped."

"You're dreaming," Fili laughed. "Bard had you covered. Did you see his shot on Bombur? He was incredible."

"You weren't too bad yourself, brother. You should have been on my team."

Fili shrugged, considering it. "We've fought so much together, it would hardly have been fair to the others."

"And then again, I wouldn't have had the pleasure of firing arrows at your head, so you know, silver lining and all that."

"That last move? The two arrows? Let me guess – Tauriel?"

Kili winked. "One of the many, many benefits of having an elven Captain of the Guard as a partner."

Fili raised an eyebrow. "I'll tell her you said that."

"She knows," Kili grinned. "I tell her all the time." He raised his tankard in a few different directions. "To you, my sweet weapon of an elf lass, wherever you are."

Fili reached out a finger and pushed Kili's tankard slowly towards the door. "She's with Sigrid in Mother's chambers. That way."

"Right, yes. And here's to your lovely Sigrid. Less of a weapon, but just as sweet." Kili raised his tankard again, and drained it. He turned to Fili and clapped his shoulder. "In all seriousness, I am so happy for you, brother. To a long and happy marriage…" He lifted his tankard yet again, realised it was empty, and looked inside it forlornly before placing it back down on the table.

Fili pulled in a huge breath, and let it out slowly, looking into his own tankard. "Happy, at any rate."

Kili's face fell, and he looked at his brother and lowered his voice. "Ah, Fili, I'm such an arse."

"No, brother. I know you meant nothing by it." Fili sipped his ale. "I don't know why I'm letting it get to me now. It's not like I haven't known all along." He straightened up and shook his head with a scornful laugh at himself. "It's the oldest tale in the book, isn't it, 'railing at the unfairness of fate'? Idiot." His eyes fell back down to his tankard. "But damn, Kili. Damn."

Kili gripped his brother's shoulder. "Do I need to fire some more arrows at your head? You haven't lost her yet, you great clod." Fili grinned, despite himself. "Fili, listen to me. That future's still a long way off. Don't let it ruin the present. And whatever happens, know that you won't be facing it alone, as long as there's breath in my body. Now stop being so bloody mawkish." Kili glanced around the hall. "I tell you what. No-one's looking. We've had the best groom's night in the history of groom's nights, but why don't you go home to your young, beautiful wife, and remind yourself why it's worth it." He grinned at his brother. "Unless you want me to do it?"

Fili grinned back at him, and clapped him on the arm. "I think I've told you this before, brother. I've got this."

* * *

Something was touching her head. A fly? She waved a hand to brush it away. It hit something pointy.

"Ow!"

"Beloved, sorry!" She heard her husband's low voice. She loved his voice. She opened one eye unfocusedly.

"Fili? You're not a fly." He was kneeling on the floor next to the bed, holding her tiara. She opened both eyes to look at him and he swam into focus, but oh, he had no business looking so attractive. She reached out and pulled him towards her. "Aren't you somewhere else? Mmm… I don't care. Come to bed."

He chuckled, and she'd never heard a sweeter sound. "Sigrid. Are you drunk?"

She giggled. "Maybe. Just a little bit. But I feel fine. I feel great." She saw the tiara in his hand. "That's mine. I love it. I'm keeping it."

He held it on top of her head. "I just wanted to see what it looked like on you. I didn't mean to wake you."

"And you think _I'm_ drunk. Let me check you." She pulled him to her for a kiss. His lips were soft, and tasted of ale. "Mmm, not sure. Let me check again." She kissed him again, deeply, and sank her fingers into his hair. His hand cupped her head and he kissed her back, and without releasing her lips, he rose and tried to climb over her body onto the bed.

"Ow. Ow!"

"Sorry!"

"That's my hair."

"Ow! That's mine."

He finally managed to settle into the bed next to her, and gently gathered her into his arms, her head resting on his shoulder. She could hear his heart beating, and his golden voice murmured to her. "Go back to sleep now, love." His hand reached up to stroke her hair, and she snuggled more closely into his side. There was no better feeling.

The last thing she heard was his soft murmur. "I've got you."

* * *

This was not good. The room was slowly rotating. Her mouth was parched, her tongue fuzzy and sticking to the roof of her mouth, and her body felt like she'd been squashed by a troll. She groaned.

"Here, love, drink something."

An arm slid underneath her shoulders and lifted her up, sending the room spinning again, and a cup was placed on her lips. She took a sip. Water. She drank a bit more, wetting her parched mouth, then stopped, feeling nauseous. The arm lowered her back to the bed.

"Go back to sleep, love."

"Can't. Dying," she mumbled.

* * *

When she woke again, the room had thankfully stopped spinning, and the nausea had lessened, and all she felt was headachy and washed out. She rubbed her forehead. The feeling brought back memories she'd rather forget, of that bleak year she had spent feeling exhausted all the time, and she closed her eyes and wondered whether it had been worth it. Then she thought about her family and friends, those hilarious, generous, amazing women who had gone out of their way to make sure she'd had a fun night, and she remembered laughing until she cried, until she had no breath left and thought her sides would seize up, at their jokes and their secrets and their stories, and she grinned. She'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Fili was flat on his back, snoring loudly, in the bed beside her. She pushed his shoulder up until he rolled over, and he stopped snoring. Wasn't he supposed to be off with Kili somewhere? He'd turned up sometime in the night, she didn't know what time or where from, but whatever it was, she wasn't complaining. She sat up gingerly, swung her legs out of bed, and wandered to the bathroom.

When she returned, he was awake, and he was looking at her.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, his eyes soft.

"Better." She climbed back into bed beside him. "The room's not spinning, anyway." He held up his arm and she nestled into his side. "Don't think me ungrateful, but are you supposed to be here? Aren't you breaking some sacred groom's night decree or something?"

"Kili gave me an exemption." He nuzzled his nose into her hair. "Mmm, you smell incredible."

"I'm all lotioned and potioned for tonight. You, on the other hand," she said, picking at a blob of cake stuck to his arm, and nibbling at it, "look like you need a tub."

"Food fight. You know what the company's like," he shrugged, grinning. "How was bride's night? Any pillow fights?"

Sigrid laughed, then moaned. "Ow, don't make me laugh, I still have a headache. No, sorry to disappoint you, no pillow fights, but Bennon and his boys came and pampered us, and we played games, and drank far too much of Tauriel's bubbly wine. It was great. I've never laughed so much in my life."

"So, worth the hangover?"

"Definitely."

Fili stretched underneath her. "Well I didn't drink that much, in the end. Kili had us shooting padded arrows at each other all night long, then we came back to the West Hall for food. We even ate some of it." He smiled at the recollection, and nodded. "It was a good night." He looked up, judging the light slanting into the room from the overhead shaft, and stretched again. "We've slept the morning away, and I'm starving. I'd go get us some food, but I'm already covered with it. Bath first." He sat up, and saw the look that had appeared on Sigrid's face at the mention of food. "And then maybe some willow bark tea for you, love."

* * *

"I'm going to head down. How do I look?"

Sigrid tilted her head to the side and looked her husband over. "Devastatingly handsome. The half of the Mountain that isn't already in love with you, will be, after tonight." She stepped in and put her arms around him. "Although I miss the cake and pie. It was a nice touch, like my own walking buffet table. In braids."

Fili shook his head at her, grinning. "I'm glad your sense of humour is back, beloved, because you're going to need it tonight. Let me apologise in advance, and I promise, I will make it up to you afterwards."

She pulled him in for a kiss, laughing at his pessimistic tone. "It's just one night. How bad can it be?"


	3. Chapter 3

Fili held his hand out to Sigrid. She stepped forward and took it graciously, and he led her past the packed tables of wedding guests to the honour table at the top of the Great Hall.

"What on earth are you wearing?" he murmured. "I thought Mother was dressing you."

Sigrid smiled out at the crowd in the hall and answered Fili through gritted teeth. "She did."

Fili glanced down at Sigrid's dress again. It was a monstrosity. Made for a bride of much wider proportions than Sigrid, it looked like nothing so much as a potato sack made out of white damask, tied around her waist in a vain attempt to make it fit her slender form, which caused it to billow out haphazardly in unflattering lumps and bulges. But worse than the billowing bunches of material was the pattern. Large embroidered anvils and hammers vied with pickaxes and spades, picked out in gaudy reds, yellows, greens and blues, in alternating row upon row of hideousness.

Fili was horrified. "Please tell me my mother did not make you wear that."

"No, she didn't," said Sigrid, still staring straight out at the crowd, her smile fixed determinedly in place. "I _had_ a lovely dress, and your mother did my hair and jewels, but on the way here I was bailed up by your Great Aunt Vos. 'Sure,' I said, 'of course, I'd be honoured if you added a few dwarven touches to my dress tonight, Great Aunt Vos.' You've brought it especially from the Blue Mountains? Sure, I said. The latest fashion? Absolutely, I said. It would be my pleasure, I said. There was no backing out once I saw it."

Fili stifled a sudden urge to laugh, knowing it could not possibly end well for him if he did. "Well, you look lovely to me, no matter what you're wearing."

She turned to him, her eyelashes fluttering and her smile sweet. Dangerously sweet. "Thank you, my love. I'm _so_ pleased to be looking my best for you on our wedding feast day." She turned back to the crowd, nodding and smiling and graciously waving a hand in acknowledgement, and allowed Fili to hand her to her seat.

* * *

Trays of food started to come out from the kitchens, and as they were passed down the honour table, Fili piled up his and Sigrid's plates with delicious-looking roast meats and vegetables. He assumed that the kitchen staff would have, as usual, outdone themselves with the excellent fare, but it was difficult to judge, as the happy couple were prevented from eating their meal by the constant stream of guests that insisted on interrupting them to offer their good wishes.

"Sigrid, this is Dain's daughter Marni."

A sharp-faced dwarf lass leaned over the table towards Fili. "Congratulations, you two! Here, give us a kiss, Fili. What a dress, Sigrid. It's so… _different_. You lucky thing." Fili couldn't tell if Marni was in earnest or if she was mocking Sigrid, but from the way Sigrid's eyes were glittering, he was fairly sure it was the latter. He was about to say something to Marni when Dain himself shuffled her out of the way.

"Move along there, lass, I want to kiss the bride." Dain leaned in to take a firm hold of Sigrid's shoulders and plant a smacking kiss on her cheek. Fili saw her screw up her face as his lips landed.

"I expected to see you big with child by now, lassie," he boomed. "Daughters of men, they breed like rabbits, I heard. Not like dwarrowdams, hey, Kili? It took your mam five years to have your brother after you were born, and we all thought that was blasted quick. It's usually more like nine or ten years between bairns." He looked at Sigrid's dress, turning his head this way and that, and gave a sly grin. "Not that you can tell under that tent you're wearing, but maybe that's the point, eh?"

Under the table, Fili found Sigrid's hand and clasped it. Her fingers tightened around his like a vice. Fili cleared his throat. "Er, thanks Dain, it was good to see you too. We're going to get on with our supper, if that's all right? The food's getting cold."

"Oh, aye, aye, eat. I'll go see if there's any mead."

They watched as Dain wandered off through the crowd, then Sigrid leaned in and lowered her voice.

"He called you Kili."

"I know. Happens all the time. Even Thorin's done it. I think Mother should have called one of us Horatio." He reached up a hand to cup Sigrid's face, rubbing his thumb back and forth over her cheek. "I'm sorry, love. This must be a nightmare for you. I can only apologise."

Sigrid looked into Fili's eyes, drew in a deep breath, and let it out slowly, her irritation easing at the touch of his fingers.

"No, it's fine." She gave him a wan smile, half resignation and half hope. "It can't get any worse, can it?"

* * *

"Sigrid, Fili, this is Great Aunt Mildrina." Dis carefully wheeled a very elderly, very frail dwarrowdam up to the front of the table in a wheeled chair, her knees covered in a knitted woollen blanket. She had neatly braided snow-white hair, and carried an enormous serpentine ear trumpet. Dis settled her great aunt in place, fussed over her blanket, and finally glanced up at Sigrid. She did a double-take when she saw Sigrid's dress, and froze in shock.

"Sigrid… dear… what…?"

Sigrid gave Dis a cheery smile that did not reach her eyes. "Great Aunt Vos and my own stupidity, that's what."

Dis pursed her lips and nodded. "I'm sorry, Sigrid dear, I've been looking after Mildrina. Leave it with me. Mildrina's my great aunt on my mother's father's side, and she's also Oin and Gloin's great aunt on their mother's father's side. She's a bit deaf." Dis handed Mildrina her ear trumpet and leaned in to shout into the bell. "This my son Fili, and his wife Sigrid. The bride and groom."

Mildrina turned her pale, watery eyes from Dis to Sigrid and back again. "Is this the elf?" she said loudly.

"No, Aunt Mildrina, this is Sigrid. Fili's wife. Daughter of Bard, the Lord of Dale, who slew the dragon. The dragon?" Dis flapped her arms. "Remember?"

Mildrina glared at Sigrid. "She's not an elf? I thought she was an elf."

"No, Aunt Mildrina, that's my other son, Kili's partner, Tauriel. Kili. This is Fili. And Sigrid."

Mildrina brandished her ear trumpet irritably. "Who now? Wili? Nili?"

Dis gave up. "Yes, Aunt Mildrina. Let's get you some mead."

Mildrina smacked her lips. "Ooh, lovely."

Dis shrugged and rolled her eyes, and then nodded significantly at Sigrid, mouthing "I'll be back," as she wheeled Mildrina away, the latter's loud voice clearly audible as they wound their way through the crowd. "She killed a dragon? How extraordinary. She's not even an elf."

* * *

Thankfully, a few of Sigrid's friends were the next to approach the honour table, and Fili saw a smile return to his wife's face. He was pleased to see that Gorin had made sure Jerrik did not forget to attend, and the two of them shook Sigrid's and Fili's hands and congratulated them warmly. Fili had forgiven Gorin for the incident at the ford last winter, once his temper had cooled, and they were on friendly terms, but Gorin's broad smile for Sigrid was not lost on him, and he laid an arm possessively along the back of Sigrid's chair until Gorin moved along. Britte's approach, with arms outstretched and a soft, high-pitched squeal coming from her mouth, caused Sigrid to leap out of her chair with an answering squeal, the two of them hugging warmly and swaying exaggeratedly back and forth. Sigrid introduced Fili to Arrild, and he shook his hand, pleased to meet the kindly young farmer whose face lit up whenever he glanced towards his sweetheart. As they moved away, Fili looked regretfully down at his supper, now cold, and tried to shovel in a few more mouthfuls before being accosted by the next lot of well-wishers. He looked up: it was his mother and his Great Aunt Vos.

"Aunt Vos was just telling me about your dress, Sigrid," said Dis. "It's certainly one-of-a-kind, isn't it, Aunt Vos?"

His mother's aunt reminded Fili of a little brown sparrow, a gentle soul, if a touch scatterbrained and clearly possessing terrible taste in clothing, and he knew his mother wouldn't dream of hurting her feelings. He wondered what she had planned.

"Oh, yes, as soon as I saw the tablecloth at the market I knew it would be just the thing," Vos warbled. "I thought it would help you to feel more dwarvish, Sigrid, you know, symbolically."

Beside him Fili could feel Sigrid's tension, and again he clasped her hand under the table.

"Great Aunt Vos," she said stoically, "it's very kind of you to want to make me feel welcome. I really appreciate it."

Vos beamed and reached out for Sigrid's free hand, shaking it up and down. "You sweet girl. I'm so happy for you both." She held out her other hand to Fili.

At that moment, Kili passed behind Sigrid's chair. His foot hit her chair leg, he stumbled, and the goblet of red wine he was holding tipped up and spilled straight down the front of Sigrid's dress.

Great Aunt Vos gasped in dismay.

"Oh no!" said Dis. "Kili, how clumsy of you! Aunt Vos, please don't worry, I'm sure I can save the dress. If we get some salt on it, and leave it for an hour, the stain should come right out. But we'll have to hurry." She held her hand out to Sigrid. "What a shame. We'll have to find something else for you to wear, unfortunately."

Fili watched as his mother led Sigrid and Vos away. Kili sat down casually beside him in Sigrid's vacated chair. They turned and looked at each other, and Kili grinned and raised his empty goblet to his brother.

"You're welcome."

* * *

"There's no rush, we'll be back in time for the speeches." Dis untied the cord around Sigrid's waist and helped her remove Vos's well-meaning but hideous, and now wine-stained, gift. "I've got your gown here. Vos is a sweetheart, but honestly, to think of dressing my daughter-in-law in a tablecloth…" She shook her head.

Sigrid picked up her gown from Dis's bed and stepped into it, drawing the shoulder straps up into place. She smoothed the satiny material over her stomach as Dis tightened the laces in behind.

"At least Dain will be able to see I'm not pregnant now."

Dis stopped short. "Tell me he did not say that."

"We daughters of men breed like rabbits, apparently," she said breezily over her shoulder. "And I have to say, Marni wasn't too fond of me, as well."

"Dain's a goose," said Dis sharply. "Yes, he's a war hero, blah blah blah, it's no excuse for rudeness in my book. I'm sorry, Sigrid dear." She gave Sigrid's gown a last tweak. "And don't let Marni trouble you. She's simply green with envy of you, that's all. There, you're done. Much better."

Sigrid turned around and smiled at her mother-in-law. "Thank you, Dis. For everything." She leaned down to embrace Dis warmly.

Dis reached up and touched Sigrid's cheek, her twinkling blue eyes the image of Fili's. "You're welcome, my daughter. Now let's get ourselves back to the party. It's time for the speeches."


	4. Chapter 4

Sigrid and Dis began making their way through the corridors back to the Great Hall. As they turned the last corner, they almost bumped straight into Kili.

"Mother, I was just coming to find you. They want to sign the papers and start the speeches." Kili took a step back and looked Sigrid up and down, an admiring smile lighting up his face. "Sister! You look much better!"

"Thanks to you, Kili. I never thought I'd be so grateful to have a glass of wine spilled down my dress."

"You're welcome, but Mother here was the mastermind of that cunning plan. I was but her humble servant." Kili doffed an imaginary cap at his mother. "I do love Aunt Vos, but she needs to be stopped sometimes."

"What's done is done," said Dis. "Let's just fix it. Kili, Sigrid, give me one minute, and then come in. We'll have the entrance we should have had last time." She disappeared into the hall. Kili held out his arm, and Sigrid smiled at him and took it, and they waited, Sigrid bouncing on the balls of her feet as they counted down the time, and then walked back into the Great Hall.

As they made their way through the crowd, Sigrid heard her name spoken, and for a moment her attention was inadvertently drawn to the conversation.

"…looked like she borrowed a carnival tent from the Dale market. Honestly, what was he thinking? He must have been forced to do it, for the political alliances with her father or something."

It was Marni. Kili noticed the sudden set of Sigrid's mouth and the glittering indignation in her eyes, and glanced around.

"Don't listen to her, Sigrid," he murmured. "Marni's a disgruntled little backbiter. She's been after Fili for years, but thankfully he's had more sense than to go anywhere near her. You could say… he wouldn't touch her with a barge pole." Kili winked at Sigrid and gave her a little nudge with his elbow. "Get it? Barge pole? Your da was… never mind." He looked for his brother. Fili was waiting expectantly in front of the honour table, also occasionally bouncing impatiently on his toes. His eyes, roaming the room, fell on Sigrid, and she saw his intake of breath, and she saw the look in his eyes, a mixture of love and pride with a generous helping of flat-out desire, and she knew that, try as the lass might, no-one who saw that look would be giving much credence to the spite Marni was trying so desperately to sow.

Kili drew up in front of his brother and made an elaborate bow, holding Sigrid's hand high, but Fili had eyes only for his wife. Earlier he had told her she looked lovely no matter what she was wearing, and in one way that was true, she was still his own sweet Sigrid even in a get-up as disastrous as Aunt Vos's tablecloth, but then again, there was this dress. It was made from a satin-weave cloth-of-gold, as smooth as silk and bright as the summer sun, and the light of the hundreds of candles around the hall set it shimmering like liquid gold itself. The dress skimmed Sigrid's body down to her hips, where it flowed generously into a full skirt that swished around her feet as she walked. She looked simply breathtaking.

Kili grasped Sigrid's hand firmly and sent her spinning towards Fili, her skirt flaring wide, and he caught her flush against his body.

"Dis wanted an entrance, my love, so kiss me like you mean it," she murmured with a smile.

Fili smiled back at her, his gaze dropping from Sigrid's eyes to her lips. "When don't I?" he whispered, and with one arm supporting her back, he bent her backwards into a dramatic dip. She threw her arms around his neck as he ran his other hand down her side to her waist, and leaned in to capture her lips. The crowd "ooh-ed" and "ahh-ed" appreciatively and burst into applause. Fili finally pulled his wife upright, and they laughed as they broke their kiss, smiling around at the faces of their family and friends, and he took her hand and led her to the top table.

The table was covered with parchments.

"When you're quite ready, you two," said Bard, holding out a quill to each of them, "start signing."

Balin, standing by the piles of contracts, laid the first one out and pointed to a spot towards the bottom. "Bride price. Fili, sign here, and Sigrid dear, just here. Bard, here, and Dis, there you are, you sign here."

After they had placed their signatures on the contract, Fili slipped an arm around Sigrid's waist and murmured teasingly in her ear. "See that? I just bought you."

She grinned. "I didn't read it. Was I a bargain?"

"Bags of gold, chests of jewels, you know, the usual," he shrugged.

Balin laid out another parchment. "Dowry. Fili, here, Sigrid, here, Bard, just there, Dis, there. Thank you."

It was Sigrid's turn to whisper. "There you go, herds of cows, herds of sheep. Just what you always wanted."

"Mmm, livestock. The gift that keeps on giving. Fancy some roast beef for dinner tomorrow?"

"We might even get to finish it before it goes cold."

"Next, morning gift," said Balin. "Fili, here… Sigrid… Bard… Dis…"

"Ooh, my own anvil. That'll come in handy. I'll put it next to the bed."

"It's a dwarven custom, love. Though I'm sure we could find an interesting use for it in the bedroom, if you want."

Sigrid swatted Fili's shoulder, and behind them the crowd laughed. They kept signing the raft of papers until they were all done, and Balin gathered them up neatly and tied them with a cord. Bard shook Fili's hand, and Dis kissed Sigrid's cheek, then Bard and Dis kissed each other, and finally Fili turned to Sigrid. He reached into a pocket and pulled out a ring, a smooth band of mithril with a large solitaire gem, taking her hand and sliding it onto the finger that already bore his wedding ring.

Sigrid looked at him in surprise, and then looked at the ring, her eyes misting up. "It's beautiful, Fili, thank you." She looked back into his eyes. "I didn't know… I don't have anything for you."

He took her face in his hands, stroking her cheek with his thumb. "There was an ingot to spare from the pendant, and I wanted you to have it," he murmured. "I don't need you to give me anything. I just need you." He leaned closer, and his murmur became a whisper against her lips. "Sigrid mine." He kissed her, softly at first, then his hands moved from her face to slide around her body and hold her tight as they deepened their kiss. The crowd cheered, followed by some friendly whoops and cat-calls, and they drew apart reluctantly, again smiling around at the crowd and acknowledging their good wishes.

"Speech, speech!"

Fili held up a hand, the other clasping Sigrid's, and the crowd hushed. "My wife and I would like to thank everyone for coming, it means a lot to us to have you all here to share this occasion, and we want to thank our families and friends and everyone who made it possible. There are many toasts to come in the following speeches, so have your goblets ready, but I can't finish without asking you to raise your glasses to my beautiful wife. My love, my life, my joy, you make me feel like the luckiest dwarf ever to set foot on this earth, and my heart is yours, now and always. To my wife, Sigrid."

"To Sigrid." The crowd raised their glasses and drank. Sigrid's cheeks had flushed bright red, but she kept her head up and smiled at Fili, until he led them back around the honour table to take their seats, when she buried her head into his shoulder.

Fili cupped the back of her head with his hand and whispered in her ear. "I know you don't like being the centre of attention, love, but I had to tell everyone what you mean to me, today of all days."

She started shaking against his shoulder, and he grew concerned.

"Sigrid, love, what's wrong? Are you crying?" He lifted her head to see her face, and realised that she wasn't crying, she was _laughing._

"I'm sorry, love. It's so petty I'm almost ashamed to tell you, but she's done nothing but annoy me all evening. Marni's out there telling people you were forced to marry me for the alliances with Dale. No-one's going to believe her after that speech." Her laughter subsiding, she sighed and laid a hand on his cheek, and her eyes turned soft. "It was so beautiful, what you said, my love."

He grasped the hand on his cheek, and turned his head to kiss her palm. "Ugh, Marni. No-one who knows me would believe that for a second. Please don't let it worry you. Now beloved, I can't wait to get you back to our chamber, anvil or no anvil, so let's see if we can't hurry these speeches up. Kili?"

Kili jumped up and moved to the front of the honour table.

"Good evening, everyone. It falls to me to talk about my brother," he began. "There's no-one I'd rather have beside me, whether it's riding the roads, wenching our way through the taverns of Dunland – all you single lads, we recommend the Blue Wyvern, don't we, Fili? – or fighting a cave full of goblins or an army of orcs at the front gate. He'd give his last breath for me, don't think I don't know that, brother, and I want you to know, I'd do the same for you.

"And then he met Sigrid. I don't remember much from the night the dragon burned Laketown," he turned to Tauriel, "except you, my love, of course I remember you - but Sigrid must have made an impression, because when she turned up at the mountain last New Years', I could see right away that Fili was besotted, completely. He went after her like Bombur after a cheese wheel. She's a great girl, we all love her, and we're so happy they've found each other. So everyone, please charge your goblets and drink – to my brother Fili and his lovely wife Sigrid."

The crowd chorused, "to Fili and Sigrid."

Kili turned and winked at the two of them. Fili had his head in his hand, and Sigrid was rubbing him comfortingly on the shoulder.

"Now, earlier on someone unexpected told me that they would like to say some words. Tilda? Would you come up here please?"

Tilda rose from her seat and joined Kili at the front of the hall.

"Hi Sigrid, hi Fili. I wanted to tell everyone about the time you climbed out of our toilet, Fili. Back in Laketown, all the dwarves of the company climbed up through our toilet into our house, and I asked my Da if they would bring us luck. And I was right. They did bring us luck. It's very lucky for Sigrid that Fili wanted to marry her, and it's lucky for me, because I get to come here and see you all the time. So thank you very much."

Everyone clapped politely as Tilda made her way back to her seat, smiling and blushing, very pleased with her first foray into public speaking.

Kili continued. "Thank you Tilda, that was great. I'd now like to invite the bride's father, Bard, Lord of Dale, to say a few words."

Bard stepped solemnly to the front of the hall, and cleared his throat.

"Thank you, Kili." He looked out at the crowded hall. "No father finds it easy to see his child leave him, the more so when you've looked after her for so long on your own. And I will tell you, in truth – I had reservations." He paused, and a few "oohs" were heard in the silence. "Not about you, Fili; I know you to be the kindest and best of dwarves. My reservations were due to the challenges that these two must face, by choosing each other. I didn't think that overcoming those challenges would be easy.

"Then my daughter asked me a question that made me change my mind. And the way she said it, her face, her voice, the very words she used, it was as though her mother Rosalind had come to life again before my eyes, she was so like. My daughter asked me, if I had known in advance of the grief my wife and I were to face, would I have still married her. And the answer to that question was yes. Unequivocally. The answer has to be yes, or what you have cannot be called love." He turned towards Sigrid. "If your mother had been here today, Sigrid, I know she would have been so proud of you, so proud, but no prouder than I am now; and she would have encouraged you to follow your heart, and face whatever challenges may come, together, head on; and she would have made sure I understood that a lot sooner than I did.

"Now everyone, please join me in raising your goblets to the families of the bride and groom, those with us here today, and those not."

The hall filled with the sound of clinking glass. "To the families."

Bard smiled across at his daughter before he returned to his seat. Sigrid smiled back, tears trickling down her cheeks, and she placed her hand on her heart, and mouthed to her father, "love you, Da."

Kili, having fallen into the role of master of ceremonies and clearly relishing it, lost no time in announcing the bridal dance. Fili rose and took Sigrid's hand, and led her to the dance floor. They looked towards the musicians, set up on one side of the hall, and Fili groaned under his breath.

"Oh no, Thorin's set up his harp. Of all the catastrophes this evening, this one could be by far the worst."

Thorin addressed them in his deep, majestic voice. "My sister-son, to commemorate the occasion of your wedding feast, I have arranged a new variation of my original composition, 'Ode to a Hobbit.'" He plucked a string of the harp. "I hope you enjoy it."

Sigrid took hold of Fili's hand, concerned at his possible reaction, and waited for Thorin to begin. He rotated his shoulders, and flexed his fingers, once, twice, positioned them on the harp, and began to play.

A rippling harmony, warm, romantic and melodious, filled the air, and Sigrid felt her husband breathe a sigh of relief. He took Sigrid in his arms, and the two of them began to glide across the dancefloor, Sigrid's shimmering skirt whirling out behind her. They were soon joined by Kili and Tauriel, Bard and Dis, and Bain and Tilda, turning about the floor gracefully, capably and rather awkwardly as their respective talents permitted, and then, couple by couple, guests also stepped out onto the floor and joined the dance. Thorin's song eventually came to an end, and the hall was once again filled with polite applause as he smiled and inclined his head in acknowledgement.

"Thank you, you're very kind. Now, please enjoy the musical stylings of our very own Bombur and the Lonely Mountain Pipers." Bombur's drum struck up the fast beat of a circle dance, and the crowd cheered, pushed back the tables and started forming up. Sigrid drew Fili aside.

"Catastrophe averted?"

He put his arms around her waist and nestled her close against his chest. "Definitely. Usually Thorin's mournful dirges go on for hours, but that was lovely."

From within the loving circle of her husband's arms, Sigrid looked around the hall. Kili and Tilda were throwing themselves enthusiastically into the circle dance, laughing and singing along with the music; Thorin had packed away his harp and was shaking Bard's hand, the two of them laughing and clapping each other on the shoulder; and Dis's hand to dance was in the process of being sought by Dwalin with a gallant bow. Bain was smiling and holding his hand out to Marta, trying to convince his shy sweetheart to join him on the dance floor; and off to the side of the hall, Tauriel was crouched beside Great Aunt Mildrina's wheeled chair, smiling as Mildrina reached out a wizened finger to touch the pointed tip of Tauriel's ear.

Fili noticed her reflective mood. "Is everything all right, beloved?"

Sigrid looked into her husband's eyes, blue as a warm summer day and twinkly as a clear starry night, and she caressed the irrepressible dimple in his cheek with her thumb.

"Everything's perfect."


	5. Chapter 5

"So, you and Kili recommend the Blue Wyvern, do you?" Sigrid emerged from the bathroom and walked around the bed, taking off her jewellery and placing it on her bedside table. Fili was sitting on a chair by the table across the room, taking off his boots. He looked up and laughed.

"I knew you'd bring that up. Am I in trouble? For things that happened before you were even born?"

Sigrid grinned and moved to the back of his chair. "No, of course not. I'm teasing. You can only get in trouble for things that happen from now on." She leaned over his shoulders and slid her hands down his chest. "But according to Tilda, it's a lucky thing that you wanted to marry me, so maybe I'd better not push my luck."

He reached up to caress her arms. "Do you think she has any idea what she said?"

"No. And I'm not going to tell her."

Fili took hold of Sigrid's hands and drew her around the chair to sit on his lap.

"You put up with so much tonight, love, and you were kindness itself. Vos, for example."

"Vos is sweet. She only wanted to make me feel welcome. But ugh," she shivered, "The Dress! Don't remind me."

"And Marni, and even Dain. I could see how angry you were, but you didn't let it get to you."

"Ah, the lovely Marni. I might not be so charitable next time. Do you think anyone would be upset if I threw a knife at her head? Although, not being an elf and all, I'd probably miss."

Fili laughed. "Mildrina got to meet her elf in the end. I saw her poking at Tauriel's ears. But she was most impressed that you had slain a dragon, love." He arched an eyebrow, his dimples irresistible. "Surely one little dwarf lass should be easy to manage after a dragon."

Sigrid sighed and rolled her eyes. "I guess Marni's mother probably loves her. I'll spare her from my dragon-killing fury… this time." She put her arms around his neck. "Now, if I remember rightly, you made me a promise that you were going to make it all up to me. Do I remember rightly?"

"You do." He nuzzled into her neck. "What do you fancy? A foot rub?"

"Mmm, tempting, but no." She leaned into his touch as his lips started to press butterfly kisses down her neck.

"Back rub?"

"Maybe later."

He slowly slid the strap of her dress off her shoulder as he kissed his way across her collarbone.

"A bath?" he murmured against her skin. "I could wash your hair."

"No, that's not going to cut it, I'm afraid."

He gently peeled back the neckline of her dress to expose her breast, and his hand moved up to cup it, his thumb brushing back and forth across her budded nipple.

"I'm all out of ideas. What do you suggest?"

He kissed his way down to her breast, and her breath caught as he curled his tongue around her nipple and sucked it into his mouth.

"I can't think. Ask me later," she breathed. She sank her hands into his hair either side of his head and pulled him back towards her mouth to claim his lips hungrily. He slid his hand under her thighs, lifted her in his arms, and carried her to the bed.

"Wait. I have an idea," she murmured as he laid her down gently, and he stopped, braced on hands and knees above her. She pushed him down onto his back.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, they fell apart, flushed and panting, their hair dishevelled, their clothing strewn about the room.

"Mother of Durin, Sigrid," Fili gasped, flat on his back with his arm across his forehead. "Where on earth did you learn that?"

Sigrid's reply, part laugh, part satisfied moan, came from somewhere near his knees.

"It's called Yavanna's Delight. I heard about it at Bride's Night."

"Bride's Night? Are you serious? How did _that_ come up at Bride's Night? I thought it was all pyjamas and braiding tips."

She propped her head up on her hand to look at him. "Can't say any more. What happens on Bride's Night stays on Bride's Night. But I think it's a keeper, don't you?"


End file.
